Car purchasing concerns
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Hello Nicole,
First and foremost I would like to thank you once again for choosing me to assist you with the purchase of your first car. I hold your family’s loyalty very dear to my heart. I have carefully read your email and I would be glad to address your concerns.
First and foremost I would like to thank you once again for choosing me to assist you with the purchase of your first car. I hold your family’s loyalty very dear to my heart. I have carefully read your email and I would be glad to address your concerns.
After carefully studying the information from the page that you provided, I could not help but notice that the numbers given are based on new tests that calculated mileage estimates only on models manufactured after 2008. Since the model that you purchased is from 2005, the scale used is vastly different.
With all that being said, I definitely would still love to help you as much as I can. Even though your request is not something we would be able to do, I can definitely offer you a list of ways on how your car can run much longer with the same amount of gas. The website that you provided earlier actually has an entire section with tips and ideas on how to do just that (http://www.fueleconomy.gov/feg/driveHabits.jsp). By following these steps you would not only have to go to the gas station a lot less, but it would also help with your budget situation.
In regards to the issues with the odometer, Honda was made aware of the situation and agreed to extend the millage warranty 10%. This means that, no matter what, your car will have its warranty for the amount of time promised. I do understand that this might be an annoying feature though, and for that I would be glad to offer the necessary repairs, complementary to you.
I have to say that I am very impressed with your budgeting skills though. Let me tell you, those will be very helpful in every step of your life. Please do not hesitate to email me or call me if you have any questions about the information in this email. Please give the most sincere greetings to your family for me.
This seems very personal and it is obvious Bill has worked with the family for years. However, I would pull a few tips you would think to be the most helpful out of the website and actually show them in your email rather than simply providing her the same link she just gave you. Your way does make your email shorter, but just seems like you found a webpage that has some information on it and didn't bother to read it yourself.
ReplyDeleteMacarena, The email seems heart felt and personal but in the end doesn't actually answer/ deny the request directly nor does it provide any additional information to remediate her MPG issue. Towards the end you offer "complementary" repairs that Honda has already acknowledged and while the wording in the last two paragraphs is "complimentary" (corrective pun intended - see dictionary) it comes across as somewhat forced.
ReplyDeleteI like how you open the e-mail and make a good connection with Nicole. When speaking of the website, though, I would list several bullet-points to make it easier for the reader. Indenting your paragraphs will also make it more reader-friendly.
ReplyDeleteAnd I would end the paragraph more straightforward to Nicole, as it sounds a bit personal and not as clear. But all in all, I think this is a good draft.
Out of the other emails I read this seems most sincere. I think it showed integrity and understanding which is a crucial part of this assignment in my opinion. Though, I would separate the paragraphs, use bullet points and or numbers and state the information from the website. By doing so you can make this email more eye-friendly and make Nicole understand that you went out of your way to help her more ( not that you have not already). If you make those small changes I think you will have it all in the box. Again, really great email and sincere.
ReplyDeleteThis email seems very personal. As if the writer was talking to their sibling. There are both pros and cons to this usage. Though that was covered in class as something that leniency would be applied to, I still found that Nicole, the consumer of the product, seemed more business oriented than this email. With that being said, I would have personally added more detail about the additional information to save on money, and to flat out decline her claim. Also the format of the email wasn't necessarily spaced out, which that would have made it a bit easier to read. Those were just a couple things that I noticed though.
ReplyDelete